Even at an early age, the idea each of us is reliant on the generation before us to get our bearings is awe-inspiring. What's more, we all find it fascinating to know what we were like at an age we can't remember.
For example, my mom always enjoyed the story about the time I stood on a stool in the living room banging on the old pie chest, which was a big no-no. When Mom, who was working in the kitchen, asked what I was doing, I told her that I was standing on the promises -- a reference to a Christian hymn I'd undoubtedly heard sung many times during worship services.
Creating an origin story for your adopted child similarly weaves together numerous stories into a common narrative. It helps your child understand where she has been and where she is going.
The primary difference is that it involves a number of other special people who might not have been involved in the origin story of your biological children -- her placing family, your fertility doctor, your adoption agency and so on.
Part of the motive for writing "Frozen, But Not Forgotten" was to have the early part of Phoebe's adoption narrative recorded when she grows up.
You don't necessarily need to be sharing all of the ins and outs of her story when she is a 5-month-old. But you will want it in the months ahead, and your other children will want to know one another's stories. Your child's placing family will surely benefit from knowing your own story and how you came to be in each other's lives.
An origin story provides an anchor for your child and amplifies his or her purpose in life.
Start by writing something down, even if it's only a few hundred words. Write it by hand in a little memory book, as Julie does, or simply start a Word document on your computer that you can print off and place next to a photograph.
In the years ahead, your child will read it and understand a little bit about his or her past. It will provide not only encouragement but a sense of direction going forward.
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